A New Toy

Will it ever stop raining? I have been outside again but only for a wee while because the rain came on and the wind started blowing again, so I just went home.

This was fine because my humans needed to go shopping and went away on the boat at lunchtime, so I just settled down and read my latest edition of 'Feline Fortnightly' when I had peace and quiet. Maybe I will send them a copy of my adventure story when it is written and I could be famous--even famouser than I already am!

I have been thinking this afternoon of the characters in my story and there will be me, of course, a hedgehog called Henry, Sammy Seagull, a dog called Dizzy and a horse called Midnight, so I shall now try thinking of a story about them all and I will tell it to you soon.

So, after I had read and thought and slept, it was time for my humans to return and I ran to greet them because I think it is important to make them feel loved and wanted and sure enough, as I bounded up they both smiled, so they were happy bunnies. Well, not literally you understand--I am using poetic licence here as us authors are allowed to do. I think I shall have a big hat and a cravat and maybe a monocle.

Once we had unpacked all the messages, I got a big surprise and it was the toy in today's picture. It is a mouse and rather a big mouse actually so I'm glad it's just a toy 'cos I wouldn't like to attack it. There is a bell in the inside of it ( I wonder how long that will last!) and my humans can unscrew the bottom bit and put in some biscuits, so that when I 'clunk' it, it rolls over and some of the biscuits come out for me to eat.

I like this toy a lot.

Another Bright Idea

I have been thinking again! Being a girl pussy cat, I can multi task and can think while I am running, jumping and hunting so I have come up with what I think is a brilliant idea.

I am going to write an adventure story! Every day for me just now is very exciting and I am loving every minute of it, but I know that hearing me squeak on about all the things I can do might be a wee bit boring for some people, so, on the days when nothing too exciting is happening, I shall write a chapter of my story! Super, eh?

It will be a kind of Famous Five story, but with animals as the characters, and I shall be the main character--naturally! Well, it is my idea and my computer, so 'nuff said. I shall give you the list of characters tomorrow--when I have thought about them some more.

Remember I told you about me 'clunking' the shower pull in the bathroom? Well, I have found another light switch to 'clunk' and this one is magic 'cos it's beside a mirror, so I can watch myself as I hit the switch and I can bang it off said mirror to make a lovely sound. It is attached to my MH's dressing table and it can keep me going for hours. I can look at all the different ways to attack the switch and work out which style suits me best. I am not vain, but I need to know that I am presenting myself in the best possible light.

One always needs to look one's best, doesn't one?

Gardening

The weather has finally improved! There is no wind and it is even quite warm, so I have been outside a lot and going far, far places that I haven't explored yet, but I am keeping my eyes open in case Sammy Seagull comes back for me. I haven't seen him since yesterday so maybe I scared him off. Some of his friends came to the bird feeder later on in the evening, but they weren't nearly as big or as scary as him, so I wasn't frightened.

Remember my I told you my MH went shopping yesterday? Well, I thought she had forgotten that Tuesday is Wii weigh day, but I was wrong! She had remembered and we did it today and I am still the same weight as last week, so I think that is OK. I am eating very well, but I am running and jumping and climbing a lot, so I think I am a very healthy little puss cat, and I know I am a very happy puss cat.

I have been helping my humans in the garden for a long time today,and when I needed a wee rest, I just nipped into this tub and I stayed there as long as none of the big birds came and 'cos it was nice and warm, I nodded off for a wee while and by the time I wakened up again, all the work was done and we all went into the house where I jumped on my climbing frame and played with all my toys, so I have had another super, duper day.

Birdies

I have been doing lots of different things today and these have kept me very busy, but I am a very happy little puss cat because my education is continuing and I am learning something new every day.

It was just me and DH at home today because my MH was away shopping in Kirkwall, so I decided to help my DH in his greenhouse. I hadn't been in it much, so I had a good sniff around the place and then I helped him put some seed in lots of little pots. We left the door open, so I was able to nip in and out whenever I felt like it, so I did this quite a lot, and then I would go back in and see how he was getting on.

After my dinner at night when my MH was home again, she opened the living room window so that I could go out and play whenever I wanted to. Well! I was sitting on the window sill just thinking about where I would go, when suddenly this great big seagull arrived at the bird feeder. It was HUGE, so I didn't move a muscle and just sat there and watched it 'cos it was much bigger than me, and I was taking no chances at all. I did not want to become Mr. Seagull's pudding!

Eventually, after I had growled a wee bit at him---although I did this very quietly in case he heard me---he flied away and I was free to go a-wandering. Then, just as I was stretching my little legs, some starlings arrived at the bird table, and this time it was different because they were much littler and so I practised my stalking technique. I hid in the plants and waggled my tail as I edged ever closer to these unsuspecting birds. I wasn't going to hurt them but I needed to see if I could creep up on them. And guess what? I couldn't! I got so far and then they saw me and flew away, but it was good fun at the time.

More practice needed.

Cat-astrophe

Not exactly a FULL cat-astrophe, but a little one, so does that make it a kitten-astrophe? Maybe I will invent a new Squeak language. I shall give that some thought. Anyway, I digress. I seem to do that a lot, so please bear with me.

I am housebound today 'cos it is very windy (again!) and wet and I decided I would stay home and do my indoor athletic training, so there I was minding my own little business, when I noticed there was no-one in the room adoring me as is the custom, so I decided to have a look and see why, and this was nearly my undoing. The life of Squeak snuffed out before it had become a roar!

Picture this scene of domestic bliss. My DH in his greenhouse talking to his plants---it's the only time he gets to talk, really!--and my MH changing the duvet cover. Now I had seen this done before, but obviously it hadn't really registered with me what was going on, because to-day I didn't know enough to stay well out of the way. Okay, I know there will be those out there who know exactly what I am going to say, and I can picture all the wise felines all over the world, raising whiskers and laughing behind paws, but please remember, I am only little. Adorable, but little and I have a lot to learn.

SO! There we are. Me and my MH in the bedroom. The old duvet cover whipped off and the new one half on, and the phone rings! MH leaves what she is doing, leaving a tangled mess of duvet and half-on cover and goes to answer the phone. It is her friend, so she is on it for a long, long time.

Meanwhile, I am sitting there grooming my dear little self waiting for her to finish so that we can get on with the task in hand, but like most kittens, I get bored quite easily and so I decided to explore. I had never been inside a duvet before and thought I would see what it was like.

Nothing wrong so far I hear you say.

Well, I was a wee bit tired after all my exercises and this duvet and crumpled cover were lovely and warm, so I must have nodded off because I didn't hear her finishing the phone call and coming towards the bed. (Cue 'Psycho ' music!)

What she normally does at this stage is stuff the bottom corners of the duvet into the cover and then lift the whole thing and shake it as hard as she can until the duvet fits in the cover. Now do you see my dilemma? Well, it was only the sound of her muttering as she grabbed for these corners that wakened me and I sprang into life yowling and shooting out of the duvet cover, giving MH the fright of her life. She yelled and dropped the whole thing as I scooted out of the bedroom.

Talk about chaos! It took us both a good five minutes to calm down and then we sat on the bed together and chuckled. My how we did laugh, but I'll not be doing that again in a hurry.

Well, not today, anyway!

Another Busy Day

Day by day I am getting bigger, stronger and busier, and if I wasn't a modest little puss cat, I would tell you that I am also getting more adorabler too. Since the weather is getting a wee bit warmer, I can stay outside a lot longer and I am becoming very well known on my little island.

There is so much to do here and there are lots and lots of places where I can go to hunt and to play and to hide when I am not exploring. I have seen a huge big tractor that made an awful noise so I keeped well away from it.

I just love being outside, but I know that my humans miss my company when I am not in the house and they also need me to look after them sometime, so I nip home every now and then and I play with my toys so that they don't know I am watching them.

My DH bought me some more wee balls and toys for my snooker board so I have been playing with those. I have also been using my house as an assault course by running at break-neck speed from one room to another then into the living room, across the back of the couch, bounce onto the swivel chair, onto the stool then up on the widow-sill and out of the window. Are you breathless too dear reader?

My MH's friend came up to see me so I put on a star performance and she was dizzy watching me as I sped around the house. She also got a fright as I leapt on to the swivel chair, but that might have had something to do with the fact that she was sitting in it at the time! (He, he, he) After I had done this three or four times, I stayed in the garden and played with the plants and did a lot more sniffing before I leapt back in the window, had a wee feed, then lay down on my couch and slept for a long time.

A very good day!

Escape Hatch

Today's picture shows me at my 'other' way out of my house. As I have told you, my house only has one door, and if the wind is in the wrong direction, or 'airt' as we Orcadian pussycats say, then when I try to go out of said door, I get blowed back in again. So, because this window is at the other side of my house, the wind sometimes isn't as bad, and I can escape that way and I can play and hunt with a wee bit of shelter.



There are plenty of plants that I can hide in and attack at the same time, so I am doing very well, although I did a wee mistake yesterday which I shall now relate. It is rather delicate and of a lavatorial nature, so I hope I do not offend anyone.



I am very good at using my litter tray but when I was out yesterday I thought I would widdle 'al fresco' and found a lovely tub of soft soil where I settled down with a copy of the 'Feline Fortnightly' to help pass the time as I did what nature intended me to do.



Having finished my ablutions, I did what cats all over the universe do, and covered it all up with this lovely soil, and it was then that my humans espied me. MH thought it was 'cute', but DH muttered something about plants and flowers, and what Tom's thumbs were doing there, I do not know!!



Reading between the lines, it might be better using the litter tray or the grass, but we will see.



Now I have a pirate joke for you. Remember I told you yesterday that I was a pirate with a cardboard boat, well, when my MH saw this, she told me her favourite pirate joke and it is:



Captain: "What comes after Q mateys?"

Mateys: "AghRRRR, cap'n!"



I hope that is her only pirate joke!

More Exploring

Every time I go outside, I travel a wee bit further away from my house and my humans have been letting me go on my own for a wee while and then they come and get me, but by that time I am tired anyway.

There is a great big field opposite my house and sometimes there are sheeps and cows in it, but just now it is empty, so I have been going there and getting to know all the smells and everything, and I can search for hours and hours and still not be too far away from my house and my dinner!

The last time I was in this field, I met two oyster catchers but they wouldn't let me play with them and kept squawking at me 'cos they didn't know I wasn't going to hurt them, so I just sat there and watched them for a wee while. They were busy building a nest and I think I made them nervous 'cos they kept watching me, so eventually I decided to give them peace and toddled away and looked for some mouses, but they must have been hiding 'cos I didn't see any.

When I got home, I noticed that my DH had brought home the messages from the pier and when my MH put them all away I discovered an empty box, so I decided that it was my newest toy, and I spent the rest of the afternoon jumping in and out of this brilliant box. I even pretended to be a pirate and that the box was my ship, and I was the captain--naturally!

I had good fun and every time I get a box, I will have a different adventure.

Resting

I have had a lazy day today, although I have been in and out quite a lot, but I have been taking the air rather than hunting or exploring 'cos after all my excitement yesterday I am a wee bit tired, so I have had a long rest on my sheepskin mat which is lovely and soft and cosy and my MH said I was snoring.

It was great fun being out yesterday and I got out again at nighttime when it was nearly dark, but the wind had gone somewhere else and it was quite warm, so it was the bestest of fun again.

When I am sitting on my window sill I can see lots of birds 'cos my humans have a bird feeder in the garden and they put out stuff for the birdies and lots of them come. Today I saw lots of starlings and the most ginormous seagull! Oh dear pussy cat friends, it was HUGE! and it looked so fierce and so close that I was very glad there was a window between me and him. I did a baby growl, but just a very quiet one in case he heard me, and my MH came to see what Iwas watching and she told me never to go near these birdies 'cos they could carry me away, but I think I had rather worked that one out for my adorable little self, so I shall treat them with the utmost respect--unless I can creep up from behind and frighten them!

My humans told me that in the summer, the swallows come and play on my pampas grass and use it like a swing and they let my MH take pictures of them playing, so when they come back this year, maybe I can play with them too, 'cos my wee legs will be a bit longer by then and I'll be able to jump higher.

That will be more good fun. I am looking forward to the summer 'cos my humans have told me that it doesn't get very dark and I can be out playing for hours and hours and hours so I will have lots to tell you.

I just hope I will have time to write to you every day, but maybe my MH will help if I tell her what to write.

A good idea, Squeak!

Snookered

The weather today has been a bit better and although it is still windy, I have decided to become a hardy little pussy cat and ventured outside in the wind and the rain and I liked it lots.

First of all I went out of the door---we only have one door in my house---and I played in the garden which was brilliant 'cos I pretended to hide in the grass and where my DH is growing chives and I pretend you can't see me, and just outside my gate, there is long grass which I jump at and roll in and hide in and it is just the magicest thing ever.

Then I went home for a wee bite of my dinner and then went out again, but this time I nipped out of the window at the front of the house and ran straight for the pampas grass which was blowing in the wind----cue for a song!---and I played for a long, long time jumping up and trying to catch it, but with just little legs, I couldn't. One day I will and I will tell you all about it.

I decided to nip through my fence and went far, far away from my house to a big barn where there are the most fantabulous smells of mouses and birds and insects and everything, and I was a very happy little pussy cat, playing all by myself. When I say it was far, far away from my house, it felt like it for me, but my humans could see me from the window and from the garden, so I s'pose it wasn't very far away at all. There are even lots of pipes that I can climb into and hide for a wee while if the rain gets too heavy and then when my humans call for me I jump out and surprise them, and then run straight through my fence, and because I am still quite thin, I can get through no bother at all.

You may remember that I told you about my MH being a creature of habit? Well, yesterday was the dreaded 'weigh 'day, and out came the Wii again, and now I even have my own Wii Mii but it is not nearly as adorable as what I am! Anyway, I got weighed and I have put on a whole pound since last week, so I AM getting bigger.

I have a new toy that my DH made for me and it is a snooker table for cats and it is fantastic. It is a kind of box and it has got lots of holes on it and I can push my toys into it at one side and pull them out somewhere else, and two sides are open so that I can crawl through it if I want. Brilliant!!

I may be the only snooker playing cat in the en-tire world. Ronnie O'Sullivan ---look out!

New Tricks

Today has been an inside day 'cos there is a very strong wind outside which might blow me away and there has been rain and hail and I am definitely not ready to be rained and hailed upon, so I have been in my house playing with all my toys and chasing my tail until I got so dizzy I fell off my couch.

I had a big long sleep last night in my basket which my MH calls my 'wee hoose' because, after all my excitement and exercise outside, I was very tired, and my wee hoose is lovely and cosy and I can snuggle up and sleep as long as I like.

Unfortunately, this means when it is time for my humans to go to sleep, yours truly is wide awake and looking for some fun, but they always play with me for a while and then I go to the bedroom with my MH and attack her feets when she is in bed. I still love doing that, and my leaps are getting bigger, and according to her, my little teeth are getting sharper.

But I have a new trick and it is wonderful. I go into my bathroom and if I stand in the wash hand basin I can hit the shower pull switch and it makes a lovely 'click' sound off the wall and I have the patience to do this over and over and over again and finally this wakens my MH, but as I have told you before, my DH doesn't hear anything when he is sleeping. I am sure if a big helichopter landed beside him on his bed, he still wouldn't waken!

On the other hand, my MH can hear a pin drop. Mind you, it was in a vase that I knocked over! Oops! That did make her jump.

If you look at the picture today, you can see that my bathroom light switch is made up of a lot of little wooden wheels. Well, once I had finished playing with the shower switch, I thought I would try the same thing with the light handle, but my judgement wasn't quite right and my wee legs weren't long enough, so when I stretched out to hit said switch, I missed, lost my balance, fell out of the wash hand basin and landed on the floor with a bit of a thud, which again wakened her indoors, but this time she just laughed and laughed, although I think it is called hysteria!! When my wee paws are bigger, I shall be able to give both switches a good 'clunk' and maybe make a wee tune for her.

I'm sure she'll like that.

I Am in Heaven!

But don't worry, all my feline friends, I am still very much alive and I have had the brilliantest of mornings.

As you know, I have been out exploring, but one of my humans always comes with me in case I get lost. As if!! However I have to humour them for a wee while at least. However, today I discovered that I could get out the window at the front of my living room and my MH was quite happy for me to do this 'cos she could stay inside in the warm and watch me, so I got out to explore all by myself! I felt so growed up and it was so good I stayed out for hours and hours.

I played with the plants and I hid in among all the pampas grass which looks like a big jungle when you are just little like me and I runned and runned and runned. Oh dear felines of the world, it was the bestest thing in the en-tire world, and I can do it again whenever I feel like it.

I told you yesterday that my house looks over to Stromness and I reckon if I keep eating up all my dinners, I would be able to jump from my window-sill and reach Stromness in one HUGE leap. When I told my mummy human about this, she said if I could do that, I could bring back fish suppers. I do worry about her as I am sure she is not fully plugged in half the time. I do not speak the fish supper language!

I am going for a little nap now 'cos all this excitement and exploring has made me a wee bit sleepy. So till next time, keep yowling!

My Wee Island

I thought that today I would tell you a wee bit more about where I live and what I can do here.

My wee island, called Graemsay, is in Orkney and it sits between Stromness and the island of Hoy in Scapa Flow. It is a very small island and measures just about two miles long and a mile wide. There are only about twenty five people living here and most of them are farmers with lots of ginormous sheeps and even ginormouser cows, and in the summer there are lots of baby sheeps and baby cows in the fields. I think I would like to play with the babies even though they are much bigger than me, but I would only go over to them if the mummys weren't there.

There are lots of lovely places on the island and a super duper beach where my MH went swimming one day, but I think she needs to wait until somebody heats up the sea before she does it again. There are also two lighthouses on my island--a high one and a low one--and these help the ships when it is dark or the driver doesn't know the way.

My house is up quite high on the island and looks down on the low lighthouse and into Stromness harbour, so I can watch all the boats coming and going and there are a lot of these. The huge Northlink ferry passes my window and so do the fishing boats and the boats carrying all the divers, so in the summer there is a lot for me to watch.

I have quite a big garden which is all grass and some plants that I can hide in, and no matter where I am in my garden, I can see the sea, and if I go out of the door and onto the grass I can sometimes see the big oil tankers at Flotta, although they don't look too big 'cos they are quite far away.

The island has lots of fields too so there are lots of hunting places for a fearless and adorable kitten like me and I have been going out a wee bit further every day to see what else is out there in my big wide world.

There are some other cats on the island too, and some are farm cats and sleep in the barns, but some are spoiled like me and are house cats who go out to play a lot but come inside too, 'cos our humans need to be fussed over sometimes. And because there are lots of fields, this means that there are lots of mouses to chase, but I haven't seen one yet. I have seen lots of birdies--big ones and little ones, but they are up too high for me to talk to them, so I shall wait until they are sitting on my grass and then I shall sidle up to them and give them a wee surprise.

As well as the fields and all the farm animals, there are some children on my island and they have promised to come and see me and I know they will adore me, so I am looking forward to them fussing over me and playing with me. There will be lots of places that we can go together and lots of adventures that we can share, so it will be really good fun.

Today's picture is much the same as yesterday's but you can see the sea in it so you will know what I am talking about.

Another Possibility

I have been thinking. If my sniffer-cat job is not possible, I could be a stand-in (or sit-in) lion in Trafalgar Square.

I am sure the lions there need a wee holiday every now and then because sitting around all day doing nothing must be very tiring, so I could offer my services as relief lion. I have been practicing the pose and I think I have perfected it and if you look at today's picture, I am sure you will agree.

If my DH could put wheels on my pet carrier and my MH makes me some sandwiches and gives me my paw-ket money, I could just nip down to London for a wee while and strut my stuff. I think I am ideally suited for this position because I love having my picture taken and I adore being fussed over.

Picture the scene, dear reader. Millions of people in Trafalgar Square taking pictures of the lions and then one of them nips off for a wee rest and yours truly takes over with an adorable nonchalance that comes with knowing that I can do whatever I put my mind to. I will be the talk of the entire world and may even be on the 'and finally' bit of News At Ten.

That would be magic watching myself on my television. I must learn to sign paw-tographs as I am sure I will become a STAR!

Pussy cat, pussy cat where have you been?

I've been to London, that's where I've been.

Pussy cat, pussy cat what did you there?

I was a lion in Trafalgar Square.

Now I know if you look at today's photo, you will see that I am facing a wall. Well, it was only when I got up on the wee wall that I realised that the scenery had disappeared, but then I remembered my dear friend Button's advice and pretended that I had intended doing just that, but I can tell you now, dear feline family, I was frightened to do anything in case I fell off the wall!

Memo to self. More wall walking practice.

Unique

Unique is my middle name. I am totally and utterly unique and I shall now tell you why.

The more eagle-eyed readers may have noticed that I have odd eyes--not odd in a strange way, more odd in an adorable way (naturally!) My right eye is different from my left one because it looks speckled and the other one isn't.

When my MH asked my vet about this, she said everything was OK and that this was ---wait for it-- and old injury!! Oh readers, that did make me chuckle. Here am I only seventeen weeks old, practically brand new, and already I have 'an old injury'. I reckon it gives me character and makes me DEFINITELY unique.

The only problem with this is that I may have to rethink my undercover work because I may be easily recognised and this might give the game away. Unless of course I could wear dark glasses? I quite fancy being mysterious, but interesting.

I may need to reconsider my choice of career although I have my wee heart set on the sniffer work, but since I am still very young, I can keep watching my television for other opportunities.

Meanwhile, I shall continue with my physical training as I need to keep in shape for every eventuality and whatever I do, I know will take much grit and stamina, so I am going to have a wee rest now while I contemplate what lies ahead.

Inspiration!

As you know by now, I am almost fearless and I think that by the time I am six months old, my fearlessness shall be complete and I may even terrorise the neighbourhood every now and then if the mood so takes me---but only when there are no ginormous cows around!

And as you also know, I like watching my television and the other night I watched a programme about sniffer dogs which sent my wee brain into a whirl and I now know what I want to be when I grow up.

I am going to be an undercover sniffer cat!! Brilliant, isn't it?

I have already begun my training in earnest and today's picture shows me in the indoor leg of of my strenuous undercover exercises. I am very good at moving along the floor on my side and my MH says I am doing the swimming side stroke, so I reckon I would be able to sidle up to anyone or anything that looked suspicious without being spotted.

As well as keeping up with my many daily visits to my climbing frame, I have been training for the undercover part of my career by heading under my coffee table, and although it looks as though I am trying to steal the chocolates, I am pretending to be a very special undercover agent and the last place you would think of looking for me is under that table--sure it is? My disguise is complete.

My pouncing skills are also coming on in leaps and bounds ( get it? he he) and I have been doing this outside to frighten the flies, but I also do this inside and I managed to give my DH a terrible shock when I jumped on top of him from the bedroom window-sill when he was sound asleep. Oops! he wasn't very happy, but with a few months of therapy, he should be OK.

If you need an undercover sniffer cat to help you, I am here.

Life sure ain't dull.

On My Travels

On Monday my DH had to take me on the boat to go to the vet in Kirkwall. I have my own big pet carrier, which is like a people carrier without the wheels, so I was quite comfortable and a nice lady from Cat Protection picked me up and looked after me all day before putting me back on the boat for my DH.

I am very well, but I had to have a kitten MOT and my second injection and I also got some medicine for a wee cough that I have and I-DO-NOT-LIKE-IT!! It is a three way fight between me and my humans to see if I swallow it or they wear it! Mind you, they usually win!

To get to the vet, my DH has to take me to the pier on our wee island, then I go on a boat and this takes about fifteen minutes, and then I travel into Kirkwall either on a bus or in a car which is a journey of about thirty minutes, and then I have to do the same on the way back home. So by the time I get home, I need a wee bit exercise and so my humans took me out to play in the garden and this was brilliant 'cos I'm not afraid any more and I am able to do a lot more exploring. I go a wee bit further every time I am out and I have now discovered that I can slip through the fence and crawl under the gate. My MH once crawled under a gate too, but that is another story!!

So on Monday I explored lots of bits of my garden and played with the daisies before going into my house for a wee sleep.

I had had a very busy day.

I Am Back!!

Hello again, dear readers. I hope you haven't missed me too much, but I see that Sian has told you about the big dragon that came and breathed fire at my phone cable and melted it, and we have been waiting for the BT man to arrive at Chez Squeak to fix it, and he did that today, so hopefully the big dragon won't come back again.

Meanwhile, I have been a very busy pussycat and have quite a cat-alogue of things to tell you.

I am growing every day in size, in braveness and in adoreableness, and my humans thank I am wonderful, especially my MH (mummy human, in case you have forgotten) 'cos I don't waken her up at 5 o'clock any more. I get up quietly and have a wee feed and a wee play and she only comes to see me if I knock something over, and I don't do that unless I want her to play too.

We have been working on the computer and I am getting cleverer at this and can do lots of things with my humans. I have been outside lots of times now and for a wee while longer every day, and I have even been out at night when it was very dark, but I liked it. My humans come with me 'cos I am still too little to be out on my own, but it is great fun. I am having great big explores and adventures. I have seen an oyster catcher and some starlings and I even sniffed a wee daisy, so my nature education has begun.

I am, however, a wee bit concerned as I have just discovered some HUGE noisy monsters in the field beside my house, but they are not dragons 'cos they're not on fire. They are the hugest pussycats I have ever seen. As I told you, I am still little and I am only about six inches high and these creatures are like mountains. They are ginormous and make a terrible noise and according to my humans they are called cows. I may be brave, but I tell you now, I am definitely staying away from them!

Talking of monsters. If you look closely at today's picture, you will see that my MH is part zebra!

My Big Adventure

I have been outside again! And for a long, long time and I liked it.

It is a sunny day here and it is quite warm with just a wee gale blowing--well it feels like a gale to me 'cos I am just very little, but adorable!

So, my MH went into the garden and left the door open and then called to me again, so I went for a wee look. I am a VERY curious pussy cat and need to see everything. Well, she stood at the gate and gradually I went onto the path and then onto the grass. It tickled my wee paws but I liked it. I had a good sniff at everything I could reach, but I didn't jump up on anything 'cos I was still a wee bit scared, but I am getting braver every day, so I shall soon be having wonderful adventures which I can tell you all about.

Now, a question for all my feline friends out there. Do your humans repeat everything as though they think we will reply if they say it often enough? My MH does this and it drives me crackers! For example, at feeding time she will say 'Are you hungry wee puss? Eh? Are you hungry?' What am I expected to do? Answers on a postcard please!

Humans are quite odd.

Mii and the Wii!

I am sixteen weeks old today! A whole four months, and I have been in my house for three weeks, so there are lots of anniversaries today.

I was up bright and early at five o'clock to see if I had got any presents, but I didn't, so I went back to waken my MH. She was tired this morning and didn't want to get up in what she calls the middle of the night. (I shall miss out all the extra words that come with that in case I get into trouble!) However, once I had climbed over her face and kneaded her head with my delicate little claws, she decided to give in and come and pander to my every whim.

The day carried on as normal after that, and it was another day of housework, so again I had to stay out of the way of the awful vacuum cleaner. Did you know that vacuum is the only word in the dictionary with two us together? Unless anyone out there knows another one?

So, once all the hoovering and dusting and polishing was done, it was my turn to be played with for a while with all my toys and my climbing frame, and then I retired to my blanket on the couch (no, not the ground!) for my wee snooze, but boy, was I in for a surprise!

Out came the Wii again. If you continue reading all my posts, you will find that my MH likes routine and order. She likes something called symmetry too, but I don't know what that is yet.

My DH disappeared to play on his computer and before I knew where I was, I was being weighed in the Wii! She has decided that I will be weighed every Tuesday and the wee man inside the Wii will keep a record of it all, so watch this space and see how I get on.

I am now going to continue my nap now until feeding time, so bye bye.

No Eggs!

Well, I didn't get any Easter Eggs and I must admit I was a tad peeved, but then I discovered my new basket and I cheered up a wee bit.

I had noticed this in my living room before, but hadn't paid much attention to it, 'cos to be quite honest, there is a lot to do here, and I was leaving that for later. However, I was in such a state of peevedness that I decided to attack it, both from the outside and the inside and I was fully expecting the normal 'tut, tut' when I do something wrong, and was quite surprised when I discovered that this was all mine. It is very comfortable and I had a wee napette in it--really just to please them indoors-- but my favourite sleeping place is still on a knee.

I have been very, very busy today as it took me a lot of running, jumping and climbing to get rid of all my energy and my two humans are lying down in a darkened room as I write this.

AND!! I have been outside in the big world again. Not for very long and not too far away from the door, but it is a start. My MH (mummy human) had gone outside for a minute and she left the door open and called to me, so I went into the porch and sniffed for a long time, until gradually and paw by paw I stepped onto the path!

I stood sniffing for a long time and there are lots of lovely smells, and I could hear all the wee birds talking to me but I wasn't ready to go out and play, so after a wee minute or two, I went back in feeling very brave and quite delighted with my little self, and I know that soon I shall be able to venture further.

Day of Rest

I have had a very mixed day--exercising, resting, eating and being fussed over. All of these have become my very favourite pastimes, although I do like sitting on my mummy human's knee while she plays on her computer.

I was up bright and early and 5.30 am and of course my mummy human had to get up too and we even managed to get my daddy human up too, although that was really by accident, because he heard my mummy and me playing and he thought it was up time and it was only when he opened the curtains and saw that it was still dark, that he realised he had done a wee mistake and was not best pleased.

However, since we were all up anyway, I decided that we should just start our training early and so I pounced on my climbing frame and attacked every single toy in my collection while my two humans got into the act by throwing said toys for me.

After an hour of concentrated exercise and training, I finally let them get back back to bed and I went with them and curled up for a wee while.

The rest of the day passed fairly uneventfully and I inspected all my corners again, and watched the birdies from the window. There is a bird feeder outside my house, so I can get a good view of all the winged visitors, but I still don't want to go outside yet as it is still too windy for a little pussy cat like me.

One of my mummy human's friends came up to see me and I gave her a sparkling display of my energetic runs, leaps and bounds and she thinks I am wonderful too!

After this, the dreaded Wii came out and mummy human did her exercises and today's picture is me having a wee belly-laugh, but please don't tell her 'cos she thinks I am yawning.

My day finished up with an early evening nap and then another concentrated effort on the climbing frame before going to bed with my mummy human and attacking her feet. My leaps are getting bigger, so I must be getting stronger. Someday soon I will take all this energy outside, but not just yet.

Hobbies Part 2

I have discovered the telly, and I like my telly. I have seen all sorts of weird and wonderful things already and I am not yet four months old, and really adorable, in fact I think I am getting more adorabler by the minute.

I have smelled the manure down in Emmerdale---smells like home sometimes--outside I mean!-- and I have walked the cobbles of Coronation Street and sat in the jail with Gail, I have been all over the place with Countryfile and I have seen lots of lovely eggs that I want the Easter bunny to bring me.

My favourite programme to date is football and I have been watching Wayne Rooney scoring goals and I hope his wee ankle is getting better. I have been practicing playing like him in my own living room, and even though I say it myself, my front paws are pretty nifty.

Now, all these things are the wonderful part of my viewing, so I must come to the weird part and I do apologise in advance to any of my readers who are of a nervous or delicate disposition, and also to anyone who is eating.

My mummy human has a Wii----not the Wii in a litter tray, but a Wii game, and it is not a pretty sight when she gets going. Mind you, she has been threatening to slip into purple Lycra complete with sweatband, and if that comes to pass, then I am looking for a new home!

She prances around the living room on a daily basis getting in to all sorts of shapes, and then comes the dreaded weigh-in, and in fear of my little life I am saying nothing!

I even got weighed, but fortunately animals can't do the exercises, so I can escape that humiliation, 'cos I'm sure she'd have me in matching purple Lycra and that is definitely a step too far, in fact I shall have to lie down until that thought passes.

Later, much, much later. I feel strong enough to continue now.

After all this exercise and jumping about, she then plays golf and tennis, but I can assure you that Tiger Woods and Andy Murray have nothing to worry about. She has even tried boxing and that is quite hysterical!

My interest in all this is the lovely bright colours and all the super noises that come from my television, but I haven't worked out yet how I can chase the balls. I need to look into this further. When I am sitting peering at the screen and pondering, I get a row because I interrupt the signal from the handset, and she loses another game, but when I'm not there, she loses all by herself.

Life is certainly not dull.

Oops!

For this post I will take my dear friend Button's advice. I know we haven't met yet, but I am sure we will be friends and swap many a mouse and human tale in the years to come.

Anyway, if you are a cat reading this, I have made my first slip up but if you are of a human disposition, then it was just another part of my basic survival training.

Yesterday, in Maison Squeak, it was all go as it was a cleaning day and everything that stood still was either hoovered, washed or dusted, so me and my daddy human kept on the move---just in case. Also, I wanted to further my skills by following her and jumping from place to place---I almost frightened the old dear out of her (few) wits at one point---and I had to make sure all this work was done to meet my rather exacting standards.

All of this had gone well and I was feeling very pleased with myself, and on reflection, perhaps just a tad over-cocky because when she went into the big cupboard to get clean towels, it all became unstuck.

As you know, curiosity is one of our more endearing traits and so I sidled into the cupboard unbeknown to her dear self and began some more exploratory work.

Now I know all the older and wiser felines among you will be sighing and there will be much rolling of eyes, but please remember I am still very little etc. etc. and have to learn that if I sneak in, she doesn't see me, and if she doesn't see me, she doesn't know I am there, and if she doesn't know I am there, she can't make sure I am out. See?

So! Oft she went again on her cleaning way, gaily humming to herself, and shut the door with me stuck in the cupboard. I never made a sound, not one single miaow, in fact I think I was a wee bit shell-shocked and it was dark in there so I was a wee bit frightened.

However, I did find a ladder ( it is quite a big cupboard! ) and practiced my climbing skills until I managed to reach nearly to the top of the ladder where I perched until I was released.

I could hear my humans calling, but decided to play the game a wee bit longer, when suddenly my mummy human remembered where she had been (apparently this is an unusual occurrence) and opened the door to find me up the ladder trying to open the loft hatch.

My how we did laugh!! Naturally there are no pictures of this escapade so today's offering is an action shot of yours truly.

Hobbies

Apart from all my educational work, I do take some time out to pursue relaxing pastimes and so far all of these have been undertaken indoors.

I have been out in the big, wide world just once, and to be honest I didn't like it at all. My humans carried me out to the garden, but I must admit to a little apprehension on my part and when my mummy human put me down on the grass, I took off and was back on my couch before she could straighten up again! In my defence, in case you think I am a scardey cat, it was blowing a gale at the time, and as I am just little, I didn't want to get blowed away.

I nearly went out one other time and this time I took the air for a wee while longer. As my devoted readers know, I love sitting on the window-sill and so my humans opened the window for me. I gingerly stepped out and sat on the outside window-sill and sniffed the air. This was lovely, and I was feeling quite brave until the cows next door started to shout and I got a fright and ran indoors again. Okay---how was I to know it was their feeding time and they couldn't see me? I thought this was the noise of huge mouses, and I was taking NO chances!

And so my indoor hobbies include refining my martial arts skills, sprinting from room to room usually at breakneck speed, perfecting my high jumps--on the table, on the shelves and on to the backs of chairs, but I am also learning to go the computer and today's picture shows me and my mummy human doing our lessons.

After all this excitement and exertion, I usually climb up on a knee and have a wee nap, and that's what I need to do now, so bye, bye.